My introduction to pet ownership began with a rescue dog from a second-chance organization dedicated to saving dogs from euthanasia. For first-time pet owners, the journey of deciding to adopt a pet, coupled with the challenge of finding one that fits your lifestyle and has a compatible temperament, is no small feat. I vividly remember asking myself, "Now what?" after bringing my dog home during that first week. This was back in 2009—before the surge of YouTube’s pet training videos.
My wonderful niece took on the task of teaching our rescue basic commands, while I focused on discipline, inspired by Cesar Millan’s pet training books and videos. As time passed, we noticed our dog responded to commands effortlessly, even without hours of formal training. That’s when I realized something often overlooked by trainers: dogs learn through positive behavioral training, repetitive experiences, and real-life interactions—both good and bad. Six dogs and sixteen years later, this lesson has been consistently proven true.
Years later, after several attempts to adopt another dog, I purchased a puppy from a local, humane breeder. Faced with conflicting advice from dog trainers on YouTube and in books, I decided to return to the methods that had worked for me before. Here are practical tips I've learned as a real-life dog parent.
Positive Behavioral Training
Both humans and pets respond well to positive reinforcement. Imagine asking someone to complete a task politely, perhaps offering an incentive. You’re likely to receive a favorable response. Now, contrast that with issuing a demand without any respect or benefit—chances are, it will be met with resistance or resentment. Asking with respect fosters healthy relationships; demanding breeds control and dominance.
This philosophy guides my approach to positive behavioral training. It's about creating a family dynamic with pets, not an ownership hierarchy based on dominance and control. That’s why I prefer to be called a dog parent, not a dog owner.
A few years ago, I relocated from the quiet suburbs to a bustling city. My two-year-old and four-month-old poodles weren’t accustomed to the constant activity outside our windows. They’d erupt in loud, boisterous barking during my back-to-back virtual meetings. Seeking solutions, I found conflicting advice: some trainers suggested treats for redirection, others recommended using a spray bottle, and some even advocated shock collars—a method I find inhumane.
Frustrated, I experimented with giving treats when they barked during meetings. Surprisingly, it worked. The moment I said "quiet" or "shhh," they came running for a treat. Over time, they responded to verbal cues alone, even without treats. This success wasn’t just about positive reinforcement—it was solidified through repetition.
Real-Life Experiences & Repetitive Behaviors
When my poodle was a few months old, I took him to a local park. He was fascinated watching a man play fetch with his Labrador. Inspired, he ran home, found a ball, and brought it to me to throw. I was amazed by how quickly he connected the dots. Every time we saw that duo at the park, he'd rush home to play with his ball, inventing new games and entertaining himself for hours.
As he grew older, his love for fetch turned into constant requests, often dropping a slobbery ball on my lap during meetings or dinner parties. To balance his enthusiasm with my sanity, I bought an automatic ball thrower, but he was terrified of it. So, I pivoted. After a few throws, I’d say, "self-play," gently blocking him from placing the ball on me. Over time, this repetition paid off. He understood that "self-play" meant entertaining himself with one of his many invented games.
One day, my sister laughed, saying, "It’s like you made up a word he completely understands." And that’s exactly what happened.
Final Thoughts
I firmly believe that pets are no different from humans when it comes to learning. Treat them with respect, communicate positively, and reinforce behaviors through real-life experiences and repetition. This not only fosters healthy relationships but also establishes two-way communication that leads to positive behaviors.
While I respect professional trainers and have followed advice from experts like Lucky Dog and Zak George, I believe that pet parents know their dogs best. Training doesn’t have to be complicated. It starts with a foundation of respect, positivity, and consistency. Try incorporating humane, consistent practices with your pets, and you might be surprised at how effective real-life experiences can be.
